Why is George Bush such a dumbass?

Good question. I decided to put this to a scientific test, using the quantum theory as a guide. I did this by creating the following apparatus: I hooked up a device that fired brain cells from a rhesus monkey into an apparatus that split into a right leg and a left leg. I first fired 1,000 brain cells into the apparatus, and it showed that 50% of them ended up in the right side of the apparatus and 50% ended up in the left side. I next tried this with 100 brain cells with the same result. I then did it with 10 brain cells, and once again got the same result. Finally, I did it with one brain cell, and I'll be damned if I didn't get the same result. But how could I see brain cells in both sides of the apparatus if I had fired only one brain cell into it? Turns out that brain cells are so small that the very act of measurement alters the results. If, instead of measuring both sides at once, I measured only the left side or the right side of the apparatus, I would only see a brain cell 50% of the time. So, in measuring both sides at once, I was actually looking at a probability distribution of where, either right or left, that the brain cell would end up. OK, so I had a solid look at quantum weirdness using brain cells from a monkey, but did it apply to humans too? Good question, so I took a brain cell from George Bush, and tried the experiment again. To my surprise, this brain cell did not register in either the left or right leg of the apparatus, neither could I produce a probability wave for that particular brain cell. That's when I realized that the brain cell from Bush was not a real brain cell at all, but a figment of Bush's imagination, so I fed it to Schoedinger's cat. Unfortunately for Bush, that was the only brain cell he had. He was screwed, but his IQ increased by 10 to the minus 4th power points. The cat, however, became catatonic.